Washington, D.C. (October 31, 2006)
--
Now, just in time for Halloween, I am publishing an
article so scary that only the strong-hearted can read
it without screaming in horror!
So, if you have heart problems, or are easily frightened, please click away now!
For the rest of you, this article is a list of actors, actresses and TV personalities who are the victims of horrific acne problems, aging signs and/or terrible plastic surgery.
Their faces are so abnormal and weird-looking that it's difficult to look at them in ultra-realistic HD. It's not just that they look worse in high-def, they are the...
10 Scariest Stars in HDTV!
1. Mickey Rourke
He may have been in Heaven's Gate, but he looks like Hell in HD. Rourke has had his face lifted so many times, it's tighter than Kirstie Alley's jeans. The Mick's next movie is The Night Job, but it looks like he's gotten about 12 face jobs.
2. Michael Jackson
Know the old saying, "Cut off your nose to spite your face"? Well, the King of Pop took that literally.
3. Sylvester Stallone
Rocky can now be a description of his face. Sly has had so many facial surgeries that you can almost see the stitch marks in high-def. Remember that famous scene in Rocky when he said, "Cut me, Mick." Ever since, he's been saying the same thing to every plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills.
4. Jackie Stallone
LIke Mom, like son. Jackie S. has injected so many chemicals in her face that she could be investigated by the EPA. The plastic in her lips alone could set off a airport metal detector.
5. Dennis Rodman
And talk about setting off metal detectors with their face. Rodman's face has more rings than Elizabeth Taylor. His nickname is The Worm. How appropriate. He looks like he put his face in about six inches of mud.
6. Lara Flynn Boyle
Looks like her lips have become Twin Peaks. Enough with the Collagen, Lara. Anymore and they'll give you clearance for takeoff at LAX!
7. Jessica Simpson
And talk about plastic lips! In high-def, they look like they're in 3-D! I just read that Jessica is going to appear in concert with Dolly Parton. Her lips and Dolly's...No, I won't say it.
8. Edward James Olmos
What a mug! It looks like a construction team has taken out a permit on his face. Olmos' breakout show was Miami Vice, but now he just gets breakouts. People say he has a face only a mother could love. Was Helen Keller a Mom?
9. Cher
Did she get Botox? Well, let's put it this way. Her face looks more frozen than a Hollywood agent's heart. In fact, seeing her in high-def at a recent awards show gave me the chills. Her face reminds you of a Buckingham Palace guard. You could stand in front of her and scream and not a single part of that thing would move.
10. Joan Rivers
Another likely Botox addict. The red carpet host looks like she's injected more needles than Barry Bonds.
So, if you have heart problems, or are easily frightened, please click away now!
For the rest of you, this article is a list of actors, actresses and TV personalities who are the victims of horrific acne problems, aging signs and/or terrible plastic surgery.
Their faces are so abnormal and weird-looking that it's difficult to look at them in ultra-realistic HD. It's not just that they look worse in high-def, they are the...
10 Scariest Stars in HDTV!
1. Mickey Rourke
He may have been in Heaven's Gate, but he looks like Hell in HD. Rourke has had his face lifted so many times, it's tighter than Kirstie Alley's jeans. The Mick's next movie is The Night Job, but it looks like he's gotten about 12 face jobs.
2. Michael Jackson
Know the old saying, "Cut off your nose to spite your face"? Well, the King of Pop took that literally.
3. Sylvester Stallone
Rocky can now be a description of his face. Sly has had so many facial surgeries that you can almost see the stitch marks in high-def. Remember that famous scene in Rocky when he said, "Cut me, Mick." Ever since, he's been saying the same thing to every plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills.
4. Jackie Stallone
LIke Mom, like son. Jackie S. has injected so many chemicals in her face that she could be investigated by the EPA. The plastic in her lips alone could set off a airport metal detector.
5. Dennis Rodman
And talk about setting off metal detectors with their face. Rodman's face has more rings than Elizabeth Taylor. His nickname is The Worm. How appropriate. He looks like he put his face in about six inches of mud.
6. Lara Flynn Boyle
Looks like her lips have become Twin Peaks. Enough with the Collagen, Lara. Anymore and they'll give you clearance for takeoff at LAX!
7. Jessica Simpson
And talk about plastic lips! In high-def, they look like they're in 3-D! I just read that Jessica is going to appear in concert with Dolly Parton. Her lips and Dolly's...No, I won't say it.
8. Edward James Olmos
What a mug! It looks like a construction team has taken out a permit on his face. Olmos' breakout show was Miami Vice, but now he just gets breakouts. People say he has a face only a mother could love. Was Helen Keller a Mom?
9. Cher
Did she get Botox? Well, let's put it this way. Her face looks more frozen than a Hollywood agent's heart. In fact, seeing her in high-def at a recent awards show gave me the chills. Her face reminds you of a Buckingham Palace guard. You could stand in front of her and scream and not a single part of that thing would move.
10. Joan Rivers
Another likely Botox addict. The red carpet host looks like she's injected more needles than Barry Bonds.